Lemme guess, you guys thought I'd never come crawling back to you did you? Well contrary to popular belief this blog is NOT dead and I'm here to bring it back in all it's glory!! (deja vu right?) I'm sorry guys I've just been busy on the never ending pursuit of happiness. I'm gonna try to update you guys on things as best I can while trying to leave out all of the "boring" stuff. Summer is right around the corner and another chapter in my life is ready to be written. But, before we get to all that let's go over some sparknotes (see what I did there? book reference?...ehhh you get it) of things that took place during my hiatus.
Music:
Yes I am still doing music. In fact I am more involved in music now then I have ever been. I kid you not when I say that I am writing anything and everything that comes to my mind on a daily basis. Not everything "literally" but, as far as concepts ideas and rhymes go, I am transferring all thoughts to paper. I am still working hard to plan out exactly how I want to construct and deliver this upcoming mixtape to you guys in 2011. One of the hardest things I had to overcome was "finding my voice". As a long time fan of music and not actually a participant so to speak, I've subconsciously acquired characteristics and musical deliveries from artists that I like. This is a terrible habit.
When trying to establish yourself as an artist in ANY genre of music not just rap, you have to make sure you try to distinguish yourself from others. Most importantly you have to find YOUR voice. When it comes down to it I want my music to be an extension of me. Not a product of "what's cool" or "what's popular". Music to me is a form of self expression. Some people see it as a means to riches others as a means to fame etc etc.. I want listeners to feel as tho they are in my shoes for that 3 and a half minutes or so that they are listening to my song. My music has moods to it. If I'm sad I want you to feel it. If I'm feeling like I'm the best rapper around then I want you to hear my reasoning behind it. Songs are supposed to be a form of communication that is almost like a P.A system connected to my thoughts. I want you to feel the feelings behind every track. Patience is key. The music is coming soon
So what are you doing besides working on songs?
Well currently I am working 3rd shift at Walmart in Streetsboro. *gasp* You went to a private high school and left college to work at Walmart?!? haha no. I left college because I currently have no desire to be there. Could I drive back to Purdue and say "Sign me up" right now? sure I could but, that's not my aim right now. I want to do music it's my passion and one of the few things that makes me smile now a days. In order to achieve your dreams you have to do a little dirty work. Every night that I drag myself to work (my shift is from 10 pm - 7 am) I remind myself of my goal. The middle aged people I work with urge me to go back to school every single day. "You don't wanna end up here for the rest of your life. You're such a bright young man". I hear it every night. I tried to inform them that I have bigger aspirations and dreams than becoming apart of the corporate world after college but alas, my statements fall on deaf ears. I don't really blame them , I mean how many people that up and leave school actually are happy in life? Who knows and who cares...I guess I'm stubborn.
What happened to modeling and acting?
Well to put it short nothing "happened" to modeling and acting I'm just waiting for a "break". Actually while we're on the subject of that I have an audition tmrw similar to the audition I passed awhile back but ended not being able to participate in the event. Tmrw I am auditioning to travel with my agency to NYC for a big showcase in front of talent scouts in all the fashion and marketing world. Yea.. I guess I need to go get my eyebrows waxed today huh?
What else?
Besides all of that stuff going on I recently went on a trip to Washington D.C with muh lady Brooke and it was everything I needed. Everytime I see that woman I swear I fall more and more in love with her. I don't know if I'm starting to grow "old" or what but it seems like companionship and love in steadily moving up on my list of priorities. Never would I have thought that I would feel as though I needed someone around me in order to keep me sane. I feel as though I'm in a type of love triangle that is based more on necessity than desire so to speak. If Brooke is my love then music is my mistress. That made alotta sense huh? yea, it was just as confusing in my head also.
All in all I'm excited to take steps forward because the best thing about your future is you can always change it. Unlike the past who's ink has long dried, the future is merely a blank page waiting for YOU to write the epic ending. Take care everyone, talk to you guys soon
